Everlasting Place
  • Home
  • One way
    • Proof
  • Sadie Sparrow
    • Sadie Sparrow Excerpt
    • Author Chat
    • Articles
    • Book Reviews
  • Memoir
    • Memoir Excerpts
    • Reviews, interviews & endorsements
  • Blogs
    • Eternal eyes: a blog about forever
    • Golden years: a blog about the elderly
  • Old folks
    • Planting tips for Christians
  • Messages from Chris Carrillo
  • Library
  • Bookstore
  • Contact

Help her put her fears to rest

1/30/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
Even when they’re safely settled in a nice nursing home, the elderly often have more than their fair share of worries.
 
There are those whose memories are slipping so precipitously that they’re in a constant state of uncertainty and fear. There are others who suffer from diseases that are not yet unbearably painful, but might become so next week or next month. Then there are those whose intellects are intact but can no longer communicate even a simple “yes” or “no” – and still others who are lost in loneliness, all but abandoned by children who always have more important things to do than visiting Mom or Dad.
 
And that’s just a sampling of the cares plaguing the residents of today’s nursing homes. Just imagine how difficult life must be for some of them.  Then think about what you might be able to do to make their lives a little brighter, simply by visiting a few of them regularly.
 
Sometimes just talking through his or her troubles is enough to alleviate an elderly resident’s most pressing fears.  Now and then you’ll even be able to resolve a particularly stubborn problem by bringing it to the attention of the right nurse or social worker.
 
But perhaps the greatest contribution you can make to an elderly person’s peace of mind is to lift up his or her cares to the Great Physician Himself – especially by petitioning Him together.
 
As the apostle Paul wrote in Philippians 4, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.” The promised result? “The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
 
It’s true; fervent prayer always seems to calm a troubled but trusting spirit. And when you take the time to help the elderly talk with the Lord, you too can reap tremendous rewards.  
 
If you have a little time and a little love to spare, why wait? Contact the Activities Director at a nearby nursing home today and ask if there's a resident who could really use a new friend.
0 Comments

Happy birthday, Granny!

1/23/2020

1 Comment

 
Picture
My mother with Granny in Jacksonport, Wis., in the late 1950s
Today is my Granny’s 130th birthday. It’s been 45 years since she left this world for the next, but I still hold a little party in my heart for her every January 23rd. 
 
Things were certainly different for the grandmothers of mid-20th Century America. Many of us kids were blessed to have ours living with us, always ready for a story or cards or bus ride downtown. Always up for treating us to Mickey Mouse Sundaes in the old German restaurant on Washington Street.  And always on hand to babysit us, turning what would have been dreary times with preoccupied teenagers into evenings filled with our favorite board games and all the orange juice and pretzels we could consume.  
 
I sure do miss Granny, but I’m confident that I’ll see her again one happy day. In the meantime, thinking about her this morning reminded me of how different things are for too many of today’s grandmothers. Take, for instance, the beloved heroine of my novel, The Song of Sadie Sparrow:  
Sadie Sparrow
Sunday, June 17
​

On the surface, this year’s celebration of Sadie’s birthday—her eighty-seventh—was just like all the others since Ed died: a week late and executed with breathtaking efficiency by people with more important things to do. Daughter Dana had descended upon The Hickories’ North Sitting Room at precisely 2 p.m., husband Bill and daughters Hannah and Amanda in tow, each setting down bags of food and gifts before, in turn, giving the waiting Sadie Sparrow a peck on the cheek and a squeeze of the shoulders.
         
They unloaded cold cuts, cheeses, sourdough bread, potato salad, coleslaw, chips, an array of condiments, plus stout paper plates and everyday silverware. (“We didn’t have time to polish your silver,” Dana explained, launching into a litany of the week’s family activities.) There were bottles of soda and beer and a thermos of coffee—“decaf, just for you, Mom”—and a store-bought sheet cake thick with buttercream frosting.
         
There were also complaints about the blistering heat, so unusual for early summer. And there was the prayer that Sadie and Ed had taught Dana when she was just three, delivered now without even a whiff of reverence: “Come Lord Jesus, be our guest, let this food to us be blessed. Amen.”
         
For Sadie, it was nearly all déjà vu. Besides the location, the only difference this year was in her own reaction: shockingly, her feelings were not hurt, not one bit. All she felt was sorrow for her family, caught up in lives that would never satisfy, and fear that unless their hearts changed, they were headed for a Christ-less eternity. She would not let herself even think about what that would mean for them.
         
But she probed her feelings as they built their sandwiches and the kids chattered on about their latest highly organized adventures. It was a little like a poking at a once-sore tooth and finding, to her utter amazement, that it had healed completely. Conclusions were difficult to reach—she had to respond appropriately to her grandchildren now and then, after all—but she had the feeling it had come down to this: the only One who really mattered, the only One who really loved her and would be faithful to the end, was God Himself. That was what her life was all about now, and it was a wonderful place to be.
         
“Grandma? Helloooooooo!” It was math whiz Amanda, apparently miffed that she was being ignored. “Have you been listening to me at all?”
         
“Oh, I’m sorry, dear.” Sadie shook her head almost imperceptibly to send her thoughts back into the corner for the time being. “I was just thinking.”
         
“Is something wrong, Grandma?” Future M.D. Hannah this time, her beautiful face expressing serious concern. “Are you feeling sick?”
         
“No, no, just reflecting on some things. Everything’s wonderful.”
         
“Well, I’m glad to hear that,” Dana said, peering at her mother suspiciously. “More coleslaw?”
 
--From The Song of Sadie Sparrow, pages 342-343
1 Comment

Beware of lawyers preying on nursing homes

1/15/2020

2 Comments

 
Picture
Over the last decade, you may have noticed a leap in TV advertising from attorneys trolling for potential nursing-home victims. Apparently a new generation of enterprising lawyers has discovered a deep well of malpractice riches just waiting to be tapped. 
 
I think it’s pretty disgusting, personally. 
  
No doubt there are crummy nursing homes out there where residents are left hour after hour without being turned, in the process developing ghastly bedsores. 
 
No doubt there are facilities so understaffed that residents finally end up trying to transfer themselves to or from the toilet without help, and wind up hurting themselves in falls. 
 
No doubt there are places where cries of pain from an arthritic hip or infected catheter are ignored by indifferent nurses.
 
True all true, and something must be done about such facilities. But there is another side to this story. Here it is, in a nutshell.
 
Not even the nicest nursing homes can afford to watch residents 24x7. Yet, at least in Wisconsin, there are strict laws against doing everything possible to protect them from themselves. 
 
That means that occasional falls are almost inevitable. Some residents forget that they can no longer walk, and try to make it to the bathroom on foot. Others are too proud to use their walkers or wheelchairs, or are in too much of a hurry. Too often, blood flows and bones are broken, and it has much more to do with Big Brother legislating against "constraints" than it does with neglect on the part of the home. 
 
There will be other mishaps as well. Some residents will fall out of bed, for instance. The best Wisconsin facilities are allowed to do is to lower the bed almost to the floor and stretch pads alongside the bed to catch a fall. Protective rails are not allowed, you see, until the resident has actually hurt himself or herself without them; the State of Wisconsin considers that unreasonable restraint, or whatever the proper government lingo is this week. 
  
Ditto for seat belts in wheelchairs. Oh, sure, a resident who is likely to try to ambulate can be fitted with an alarm, but consider what happens if he or she decides to take a little walk: By the time anyone could get to him to prevent a fall, it may already be too late. 
  
I know about this sort of regulation from first-hand experience. My mother had a seizure disorder and begged for side rails on her bed. The State of Wisconsin, in its infinite wisdom, said no, not until you've hurt herself.  Case closed. 
 
There are other problems that are almost unavoidable when you’re caring for the fragile elderly. For instance, some simply can’t explain where it hurts; many others can’t even explain THAT it hurts. And some people are going to get bed sores no matter how frequently they’re turned. 
 
That’s not to excuse any sort of abuse or neglect. If you have a loved one in a nursing home, you really need to keep a sharp eye on him or her, dropping in frequently and unexpectedly whenever possible. You need to speak up if you find the care lacking, or the hygiene, or if you think there are medication issues that need to be addressed immediately. 
  
But we also need to keep our expectations realistic – and do a thorough job of vetting each candidate facility before investing the first day or dime in one.  
 
In my opinion, these lawsuits are going to do nothing but drive up nursing-home costs at the same time that Medicaid and Title 19 reimbursements are plummeting. I imagine that some more homes will be forced to close in the not-so-distant future. And this is all happening just as aging Baby Boomers are causing the elderly population to swell. Bottom line: More demand, less supply, with the cost of beds designated for private-payers (those who subsidize the Title 19 residents) skyrocketing beyond the reach of the average person. 
 
It’s an ugly situation however you look at it, and these lawsuits are not helping anyone but the lawyers who bring them.   
2 Comments

"Some assembly required"

1/7/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
At the most recent Christian Music Hour at Care-age of Brookfield, our peerless preacher Chris Carrillo treated us to a quick biblical tour of Jesus’ life, and its import for mankind.
 
His timing was perfect. After all, Christmas is the season that we focus most intently on the greatest gift ever offered: God's gift of salvation, delivered to us in the Person of a Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes. When we receive that gift, we become irrevocably heaven-bound.
 
But as Chris also said, even though we’ve been forever “saved” at that point, there’s still work to be done in us this side of heaven. Please listen as he explains:
(If you’re reading this via email, click on the headline above to access the audio recording at EverlastingPlace.com.)
 
We are so blessed to have monthly messages from this faithful servant of the Lord. To hear more from him, please visit our Messages from Chris Carrillo page. ​
0 Comments

    Kitty
    Foth-Regner

    I'm a follower of Jesus Christ, a freelance copywriter, a nursing-home volunteer, and the author of books both in-process and published -- including
    Heaven Without Her.

    Archives

    December 2022
    September 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

    Care to subscribe?

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

Proudly powered by Weebly
Photos used under Creative Commons from Anas Qtiesh, quinn.anya, skippyjon, gagilas, ulrichkarljoho, Schleeo, djpoblete09, 00alexx, NathanPeck, Riccardo Palazzani, MaartenEyskens, jfinnirwin, romana klee, bundesinnung_ha, theglobalpanorama, Street Photography Addict, StockMonkeys.com, Robert Agthe, Genista, Neillwphoto, frankieleon, RamónP, National Eye Institute, Pink Dispatcher, Tony Webster, quinn.anya, Peter23394, anna gutermuth, neovain, Keith Allison, lewisha1990, Phú Thịnh Co, byzantiumbooks, avlxyz, eastmidtown, 593D ESC, simpleinsomnia, mcohen.chromiste, Pictures by Ann, Stampendous, loop_oh, tedeytan, TipsForComputer.Com, ssilberman, pedrosimoes7, forayinto35mm, Never Edit, GlasgowAmateur, weiss_paarz_photos, Borya, The Graphic Details, robynejay, allenthepostman, quinn.anya, u.hopper, fallingwater123, Alyssa L. Miller, Vincent Albanese, homethods, ponyQ, Braiu, CNE CNA C6F, oakenroad, Tim Evanson, medisave, irinaraquel, Steve Ganz, Nieve44/Luz, roscoland2, One Way Stock, Film Star Vintage, ulrichkarljoho, anieto2k, meaduva, Homini:), campbelj45ca, Nicolas Alejandro Street Photography, Hades2k, Alyssa L. Miller, Carlos Ebert, @Tuncay, kms1167, Petful.com, m01229, jonrawlinson, Brian Smithson (Old Geordie), Blogging Dagger, fechi fajardo, SurfaceWarriors, Leah Abernathy, evans.photo, brianna.lehman, mikecogh, Ejuice, christine.gleason, Free Grunge Textures - www.freestock.ca, Derek Bridges, ulrichkarljoho, One Way Stock, Matt Cunnelly, nandadevieast, cathyse97, quinn.anya, faungg's photo, Lars Plougmann, C Jill Reed, johnthoward1961, mcohen.chromiste, hardeep.singh, physiognomist, ulrichkarljoho, 401(K) 2013, Very Quiet, BromfordGroup, garryknight, Official U.S. Navy Imagery, acasasola, mrbillt6, simpleinsomnia, johanSisno, GollyGforce, Jo Jakeman, Mire de rien, Chris Mower, lotopspin, Marlene Rybka Visualizing & Photography, RLHyde, jez.atkinson, orionpozo, quinn.anya, global.quiz, Public Places, alubavin, drs2biz, espensorvik, ♔ Georgie R, h.koppdelaney, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, Images_of_Money, ttarasiuk, TheArches