“Home ought to be our clearing house, the place from which we go forth lessoned and disciplined, and ready for life.”  --Kathleen Thompson Norris, 1880-1966

Home, the place “from which we go forth lessoned and disciplined, and ready for life”? What planet did Kathleen Norris live on, talking about lessons and discipline as prerequisites for living?

But amazingly, it wasn’t so long ago that Norris’s idea reigned in this country. She was, in fact, the most famous woman writer of the first half of the 20th century, the highest paid and among the most prolific, with 93 novels to her credit, many of them best-selling.

It seems strange that most Americans have never heard of her. Perhaps that’s because her fiction promoted Christian service, the sanctity of marriage, and the overriding importance of motherhood as an occupation – ideas that seem pathetically yesterday in the brave new world we occupy today.

Modern thought-leaders take a distinctly different approach to the subject of home.

Consider, for instance, the warm-and-fuzzy wisdom of Mother Theresa: “Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do but how much love we put in that action.”

Or the expect-little-of-me-and-I-won’t-disappoint-you view of Maya Angelou: “The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.”

Or the king-of-the-castle approach of the Dalai Lama: “Home is where you feel at home and are treated well.”

Kathleen Norris may seem passé in our oh-so-sophisticated world, but she remains a favorite author of many elderly women today. And wonder of wonders, they agree with her views! 

So if you’d like to have a great conversation with a woman over 80, try asking her for her thoughts on what role home should play in our lives, especially when we're young.

She might express something along the lines of “The home is the chief school of human virtues,” as 19th century American writer William Ellery Channing put it.

She might simply echo Kathleen Thompson Norris.

And if you let her tell you how and why and what we lose by ignoring this age-old wisdom, she might leave you with an entirely different view of home – one that we would do well to recapture if we want our nation to survive.   

If you're thinking about volunteering at a local nursing home and happen to be a lover of old hymns, consider offering to do a Christian Music Hour every month or even every week, if you have the time. 

A small group from my church does just that each month at Care-age of Brookfield: I put together the songbooks and the music from favorite CDs (including selections by everyone's favorite singer, Tennessee Ernie Ford), and Nancy Weinkauf helps with transferring residents, turning songbook pages, and generally making members of our senior-citizen chorus feel happy and loved. 

What's more, the entire Carrillo family pitches in. Each time, dad Chris delivers an excellent biblical message, custom-prepared and carefully tailored to the needs of those residing in a long-term care facility. And we get wonderful assists from mom Carrie and children Dylan, Tanner, Isabella, Cole, Braden and Danica -- help ranging from sharing sunny smiles with everyone to turning pages, from passing out gospel tracts to helping everyone get to their tables for lunch when we're finished.

Here are the songs we'll be singing this month: 

• He Leadeth Me
  
• Softly and Tenderly
  
• Draw Me Nearer
  
• Beneath the Cross of Jesus
  
• Jesus Paid It All
  
• The Old Rugged Cross
  
• The Love of God
  
• O Love that Wilt Not Let Me Go
  
• Love Divine, All Loves Excelling 
  
• In the Garden
  
• We Gather Together
  
• What a Day That Will Be
  

We sing different hymns each month, sometimes focusing on special themes. For instance, every year we spend an hour or two or three singing songs that feature heaven prominently, such as these: 

• Abide with Me 
• Rock of Ages 
• In the Sweet By and By
• Sweet Beulah Land 
• Be Thou My Vision 
• Be Still, My Soul 
• It Is Well with My Soul 
• Hallelujah! What a Savior! 
• Finally Home
• Shall We Gather at the River 
• How Great Thou Art 
  
• Beyond the Sunset

It's quite a popular event; we usually have anywhere from one-third to almost one-half of the home's residents in attendance. Not many of us sing very well, but we certainly know how to make a joyful noise unto God! 

If you're intrigued and have questions about developing such a program in your community, perhaps I can help; don't hesitate to drop me a note. 

I don't know who enjoys nursing-home visits more -- visitors or visitees. But I do know that there's an easy way to keep the memories you're making alive until you return. And that's bringing silk-flower arrangements that you've custom-made for each resident you visit.

I get most of my containers at Good Will and Salvation Army stores, usually for $3 or less apiece, and often find bunches of unused silk flowers there, too. But great buys can also be had at the end-of-the-season sales at local garden centers and craft stores. And there's nothing better than amassing donations from friends. Three cases in point: the beautiful basket shown above left, handcrafted by Brenda Strohbehn; the blooms in the four-legged bowl at right, contributed by Linda Edmondson; and all the materials in the fall basket below left, purchased for me by a flower-crazy staffer.

I'll share some others in future posts, including more that take advantage of my friends' generosity. 

Of course, if you want to do this in any volume, it takes quite a collection of both containers and silk flowers. My husband was kind enough to build me this wall of shelves in the garage (right). And he usually manages to bite his tongue as the scene gets more and more chaotic and spills over into the basement -- not to mention the kitchen, which becomes my washing-and-arranging workroom one night a week.  

But I guarantee that it's worth it. My elderly friends  look forward to their new arrangements each week. And between visits, they're reminded that someone is not only thinking about them, but is making something special just for them. 

I am reminded so frequently these days of the futility of trying to live one’s life apart from God – and of the bitterness it often generates, not  only in those living apparently full lives, but also and perhaps especially among those living in long-term care facilities.

Among younger people, it often plays out as frenetic activity – filling every waking moment with earthly purpose from work and socializing to cleaning the house and pursuing every possible form of entertainment. These activities give them a sense of purpose, goals to work toward, others to compare their achievements to. And, importantly, it eliminates the need to be alone with their thoughts.  

This approach to “God avoidance” can continue into old age. Such individuals may find new outlets for their busy-ness – playing cards or shopping, becoming certifiable health nuts or filling their calendars with doctors’ appointments and lunch dates, to cite just a few examples -- but there's a common denominator: calendars and To Do lists filled to overflowing.  

But at some point, this sort of life can take a sharp turn into doing as little as possible – sometimes by necessity, as health issues begin to pile up. And then comes a plunge into bitterness, fed by sitting alone and thinking about how everyone they know has let them down over the years. After all, none of this could possibly be their fault!  

It's really no surprise. As Jim Berg wrote in his wonderful book Created for His Glory (BJU Press, 2003), “The grim reality is that the emptiness of life without God at the center pushes itself to the consciousness once again when the music stops, the drugs wear off, the eroticism fails, the fashions grow old, the relationships disappoint, the accomplishments fade, and the thrills subside.”

And emptiness almost invariably breeds bitterness.  

You can usually tell within a few minutes’ conversation what a new acquaintance’s relationship with the Lord is, or is not, based solely on how he or she spends his or her time. When there’s no relationship – and when a few gentle comments confirm that this person has absolutely no interest in the things of God – the solution is obvious: These people need to understand who God is and who they are, to grasp His holiness and their sinfulness, to learn about the repentance and trust in Christ that are the keys to eternal life.

Only when they embrace these truths will they be free to shed their bitterness and embrace the promise of eternal joy. Isn’t it wonderful to know that, if you’re a Christian, you may be the one who helps them to see the light?

There are many ways to point a conversation in the right direction, and to present the gospel. I personally think that the Way of the Master’s approach is the easiest to deliver, and to understand, but you may have a better way to share the good news of Jesus Christ.  

But don’t put it off – there are too many people suffering from bitterness these days, and the Lord has equipped all His children with the cure. 

The results are in, and they’re hardly surprising: If you’re old and want to live “your best life now” without sitting directly under Joel Osteen’s teaching, head for northern Europe. You’ll not only get the biggest package of government benefits, you’ll also be where the action is when it comes to every aspect of living and dying!

This, at any rate, is the conclusion of HelpAge International – a well-funded global coalition of some sort (I kept digging but am still not sure who these people are). According to their 2014 Global AgeWatch, the top 10 places to deteriorate are: 

1. Norway
2. Sweden
3. Switzerland
4. Canada
5. Germany
6. Netherlands
7. Iceland
8. United States
9. Japan
10. New Zealand

 
To come up with this ranking, HelpAge evaluated each nation's performance according to four standards:

1. Income security, which includes pension income coverage, poverty rate in old age, relative welfare of older people and GDP per capita
2. Health status, including life and healthy-life expectancy at 60, plus psychological well-being
3. Capability, which covers the employment and educational status of older people
4. Enabling environment, meaning social connections, physical safety, access to public transport, and something called “civic freedom” – not sure I want to know what that means

It’s interesting that HelpAge International doesn’t take into consideration a nation’s dominant spiritual beliefs – specifically, what most people believe happens after death, and what that means for self and loved ones. Is the best yet to come or not? HelpAge apparently finds the question irrelevant.

I beg to differ. After nearly 15 years of hanging out at a nursing home, I can confirm that one’s beliefs about the existence and character of God and His revelations about eternity are critical to one’s contentment – especially as the distractions of carnal life fade. No one enjoys greater peace, optimism and indeed joy than the born-again believer in Jesus Christ.

But perhaps HelpAge makes up for that void with a corollary to the “life sucks and then you die” existentialist thinking that’s so popular in Europe – a corollary that says “at least you don’t have to put up with any more old age than you can stomach.” After all, while euthanasia and physician-assisted suicide are still illegal in countries like Norway, it’s probably only a matter of time before HelpAge's winning nation follows the example of its Dutch neighbors. Supporters of these practices claim that a clear majority believes firmly in the “right to a dignified death,” so no doubt their fearless leaders will soon give them their wish. 

Not long ago, I stumbled across a wonderful new ministry for the elderly headquartered in Colorado. Called Christian Family Eldercare (CFE), it’s operating under the direction of Todd Strawser, an IT professional from the Colorado Springs area, a deacon in Emmanuel OPC Church in Castle Rock, and a man with a heart for seeing the elderly biblically honored.

CFE is a ministry of Todd’s family and church, he told me recently – one that’s designed to encourage, equip, and enable relationship-centered eldercare. That means, among other things, enabling home-based eldercare as an alternative to institutional care, and exhorting church leaders to provide loving support to elderly church members. 

“We believe that we are biblically called to honor the elderly,” he explained. “In many cases, that’s not happening today, even among Christians. In fact, many families within our church have approached our diaconate for help in caring for their elderly parents. It’s our goal to be able to provide that help. At the same time, we want to address the needs of widows without living relatives; according to Acts 6, it’s the responsibility of the church to care for them.” 

For many churches, responding to these needs requires a transformation, Todd pointed out. 

“Most of this transformation will come through the preaching of the Word. So we are also calling upon pastors and elders to biblically preach honor and care for the elderly, as well as visiting and loving them wherever they are, as James 1:27 instructs.” 

CFE’s tactics include building a robust inventory of eldercare resources and lending a hand to caregiving families. “We know caregiving is very hard,” he said, “but we feel that with the help of the church and good resources, families can experience success and joy in their eldercare endeavors.”

Those involved with CFE also hope to help promote practical alternatives to the standard, costly eldercare model provided by nursing homes. Towards that end, they’re planning to host what’s probably the country’s first National Christian Family Eldercare Conference next March in Denver. Sessions will cover subjects from practical training by veteran caregivers to the economics of Christian eldercare, and everything in between.

This ministry emerged from a growing recognition the many elderly people in our culture are not being treated with the honor, respect, relationship, and value that the Word of God clearly commands, Todd said.

“We have been alarmed by what we see as the slow removal of the elderly from today’s families and from society as a whole, and the lack of direct involvement in their lives by church leaders.

“We’re talking about some of the most vulnerable people in our society. So we have felt the call for a God-fearing compassion for them as the forgotten critical aspect of any ‘sanctity of life’ endeavor.”

The need is becoming more pressing, he added, with U.S. demographics trending toward more elderly and fewer people to care for them.

“I recently read that the number of older adults in California is projected to increase by 96 percent over the next 20 years, while the number of working-age adults will increase by just 9 percent. And these statistics are being echoed across the nation and around the world.”

Sadly, he said, as a culture we tend to ignore the elderly, even in the church. “We Americans think we know everything and don’t need the wisdom of the hoary head. Which is foolish; the wisdom of the elderly is worth more than their weight in gold.”

What are Todd’s calls-to-action for the audiences of importance to CEF?

“We ask Christian children to lovingly care for their parents in fulfillment of Exodus 20:12 and 1 Timothy 5:8 – ideally, to do so at home.

“We ask Christians in general to fulfill James 1:27, Leviticus 19:32, and 1 Timothy 5:1-2 by visiting, honoring and serving the elderly – and to consider caring for other Christians, as we’re told in John 19 that the apostle John did for Mary.

“And we ask church leadership to care and provide for the elderly, as prescribed in 1 Timothy 5 and Acts 6.”

In Leviticus 19, the Lord tells us, “You shall rise before the gray headed and honor the presence of an old man, and fear your God.” Today’s too-often isolated, institutional, and costly methodology of senior care is not the best way to do that, Todd said. Thankfully, there are individuals like the Strawsers out there, determined to make a difference in these precious lives.

For details, visit Christian Family Eldercare’s web site.

Or, to update the old English nursery rhyme, make that $2 million plus.

That's what our federal government is investing in a program designed to encourage senior citizens to join a community choir -- the idea being that such an activity will keep them healthier and reduce falls, according to one report.  

Apparently one of the songs being sung by such a choir is "This Little Light of Mine." You probably know it:

This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. 
This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. 
This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.
Shine, shine, shine, shine, shine.

Now, the truth is that the song was originally inspired by one of several New Testament passages -- perhaps Luke 11:33, in which Jesus is quoted as saying, "No one, when he has lit a lamp, puts it in a secret place or under a basket, but on a lampstand, that those who come in may see the light." 

But it's not until the third verse that any biblical theme becomes apparent; that's when the singers admonish their audience, "Don't let the Satan blow it out; I'm gonna let it shine." 

I'm guessing these federally funded choirs will not be allowed to include that verse. And without it? Well, as secularized as this song has become in the hands of celebrities like Bruce Springsteen and Christina Ricci, I'm guessing that most who hear it will think it's simply another song of self-worship, a childish version of "The Greatest Love of All."  

What is so sad about this entire venture is that the peace and harmony and fulfillment that these secularists are trying to promote among the elderly are all there, free for the asking, without the need for a federal program. Senior citizens simply need to repent and trust in Christ to experience the unparalleled joy of belonging to Him. They can even join a real choir, and lift their voices in praise to the only One deserving of worship. And it doesn't cost a thing -- not even six pence.  

Think the feds might consider promoting this alternative? I'm not holding my breath.